Zero Point

The Thread That Never Breaks (An Essay)

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It’s not about me doing whatever I want, whenever I want (and it is).

Just blindly and haphazardly doing whatever I feel like, as if my existence is, and my moves are, at the whim of these ever-changing feelings and superficial desires.

No.

It’s about doing what I know needs to be done, based on my own internal commands (the innate brilliance of my being) regardless of how I feel or how it appears, and even when I don’t understand why I’m doing or not doing it.

Which one might assume takes effort since listening and obeying is foreign to most.

But when your true devotion is to the inner whisper that reconfigures itself in each moment, it doesn’t feel like effort.

It’s a given.

There is no other way.

It would take effort (and be impossible) for me to deviate from what’s actually required of me in a moment just to settle for what’s preferred.

And,

I don’t prefer less than what’s required.

So in that sense, yes, I do whatever I want, whenever I want.

Because what I want is to live and move from the core of myself with an exacting level of integrity.

Which can appear inconsistent on the outside because the consistency (and the priority) is within.

It is a thread that never breaks.

And the reason I move as I do.

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No Reassurance (An Essay)

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Him: “I know you’ll never give me reassurance.”

And why would I need to?

What IS speaks for itself.

He spoke of wanting something more solid.

Saying he knows he can’t ask or expect that of me.

And yet…

I’m as solid as can be (energetically).

He can always count on ME.

But his human wanted something concrete.

In the physical world of make-believe.

Where nothing is solid.

Where security can’t be found.

Not in a thing.

Not in another.

Just in the space one cannot claim.

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Walkie Talkie (An Essay)

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“You’re the only person I know who walks their talk. Completely.”

The result of doing the work.

Not just sometimes.

All the time.

With everything and everyone.

I’m relentless when it comes to my game and those I choose to play with.

Exceptions aren’t made.

Least of all for those I’m closest to.

Because doing the work and living in truth is the most loving thing I can do.

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Relationships Don't Need Work (An Essay)

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Relationships don’t need to be ‘worked on’.

Unless it’s the one with yourself.

Nor do they require any level of sacrifice.

Unless you’re sacrificing what’s false.

It’s not necessary.

Or energetically sound.

The vibe of trying,

reaching,

abandoning

(even just a little)

for or because of another…

kills the potency (and purity) that makes every dynamic thrive.

‘Working on’ the relationship by focusing on and considering the other, instead of tending to your own lane and operating from there, inevitably creates an energetically limp (attached / codependent / diluted) experience for both parties, despite how intense this dysfunctional bond might feel.

It’s a poor facsimile of the fire you actually crave that only comes from never leaving home.

From working on THIS; not that.

Because THIS is all there is and that will adjust accordingly.

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Diving In Unobstructed (An Essay)

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The thing about being energetically erect and intact (one’s natural state), and not playing (making moves) unless and until it’s still, is that it perfectly fucks with whatever matter I’m currently holding on to.

The exact shit that’s here to be burned by the fire of ME.

It also perfectly fucks with the shit of whoever I’m playing with.

If there are any strings of attachment (hoping / waiting / needing / trying / expecting / victimizing / or whatever other bullshit that needs to go), I don’t touch it.

But if I feel turned on despite and because of the matter, it means that it’s ready to get fucked with and I’m the bitch to do it.

So I play where it’s most alive.

Where I sense no limits, no restrictions, no actual end in sight.

Just a wide-open space to dive into unobstructed.

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“How Do I?” is Sourced From A Lie (An Essay)

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“How do I?” is sourced from a lie.

It implies that something is wrong / lacking and clearly needs fixing.

You think you need to lose the weight / make the money / get the partner / overcome the condition (whatever the fuck) to feel / be / do / have A, B, C.

But you don’t.

Be HERE.

Right NOW.

And do whatever you’re being called to do in each moment.

Illusory problem(s) solved.

But because you can’t handle the beauty and simplicity of being present in the moment,

or the responsibility of both listening to and honouring your innate brilliance,

or the potency of the fire that comes from being THAT close and devoted to YOU regardless of externals,

and you’re hell-bent on fighting against what IS because of your idea of, and preference for, how it ‘should’ be,

you take the long and completely ineffective way around the truth and power of who you are.

Any attempt to ‘fix’ what’s inherently not a ‘problem’ in the first place, cannot be sustained because it’s both sourced from, and being overlayed with, a fallacy.

Creating an endless loop of shit that never does the trick.

You think it’s about the food / the money / the body / the babe.

But it’s only ever about you vs YOU, which shows up in all the things.

And…

When you begin to see through it,

when you get to the place where you KNOW you’re good regardless of your size / your bank account / a relationship / your health (whatever the fuck),

and you know that YOU are bigger than (and the creator of) ALL those things,

(because THAT is the absolute fucking truth)

THEN you are free from the energetic gridlock that’s been keeping all that shit stuck like a mutherfucker.

THEN you get to experience what has always been on the other side of that illusory jail you’ve kept yourself in this whole time.

But until you figure that out and get to that place,

your perfectly orchestrated externals are going to do their brilliant magic to show you that what you seek (and already are) cannot be found within any of them.

Every door ‘out there’ is gonna close until you finally open the only door that matters with the key you’ve always had.

Man, I just love how that works.

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The Other Side Of The Deepening (An Essay)

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I don’t know,

or even care about,

who or what is on the (illusory) other side of this deepening.

I don’t care who or what stays.

I don’t care who or what goes.

I don’t care who or what arrives.

At all.

I only care about being right here.

Right now.

Connected to the truth and to the pulse of ME.

Why would I leave home for anything?

All that’s for me is right here at my feet.

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A Dance Of Two Who Are Moving As One (An Essay)

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I wanted to start this post with, “I had the best SEX ever last night.”

(peep my thoughts on SEX vs sex)

Because that’s how I describe whatever truly hits my spot.

The best (fill in the blank) ever.

Because in the moment, that’s how it feels.

Floating in heaven.

Nothing can top THIS.

But more accurately, it’s just another gorgeous experience of presence and truth, which always feels like heaven.

So yummy.

So delicious.

Swoon.

And as we played, it was so quiet.

So incredibly still.

Even amongst the sounds and movements.

And…

It was the most natural dance with another.

With myself.

Through the other who is me.

A dance so fluid I didn’t notice the moves.

I only felt the dance.

And…

I can’t even say that the SEX keeps getting better, deeper, richer…

because that would imply it was less so the first night and that wasn’t the case at all.

We moved beautifully and seamlessly and magically then as well.

Because presence in the NOW is as deep as it gets.

Playing for the first time — EVERY time.

Why show up for less?

We’ve never replicated previous scenes.

Nor have we tried to create one.

Art is made in the moment.

Last night, another masterpiece.

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Will You Get The Thing Or Not? (An Essay)

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It’s not true that once you clear the matter, you automatically get the thing.

You clear the matter and see that it was never about the thing in the first place.

You clear the matter and know you’ll be good with or without this thing (or any other thing you thought you needed / deserved / were entitled to) because there’s no longer any weight attached to it.

And…

Sure, you might get the thing.

In spades.

Or something else entirely.

Beyond what you could have imagined.

But only if / when / how it’s true for your being.

Something you can’t control.

And so what?

You’re always getting exactly what’s true for you anyways.

Like clockwork every step of the way.

Regardless AND because of the matter.

So matter can’t stop you from getting what’s yours

and being free of it also ensures it.

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