How To Know You've Made It (An Essay)

peace is the indicator

clarity is the indicator

laughter is the indicator

joy is the indicator

freedom is the indicator

thrill is the indicator

ease is the indicator

simplicity is the indicator

knowing is the indicator

certainty is the indicator

deepening is the indicator

stillness is the indicator

satisfaction is the indicator

potency is the indicator

purity is the indicator

union is the indicator

more is the indicator

less is the indicator

everything is the indicator

nothing is the indicator

and anything in (and on) the way of (and to) this

is your moment-to-moment assignment

until everything is clear

Book a private call to clear it all.

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How To Make More Money (An Essay)

I knew that’s what you wanted.

More money,

more freedom,

more experiences,

more things.

But there’s just one thing in the way.

Yes, just one.

If money’s not moving the way you want it to,

the required shift is fully,

and solely,

in your hands.

No one can do this for you.

No one is coming to save you.

And winning the lottery can’t ‘fix’ this glitch.

And…

this group conversation can’t override what you’re not willing to do ‘for’ your money.

But if you’re fucking ready to flip the switch,

because you’ve had enough of ‘not nearly enough’…

and/or you’re simply ready for the MORE you’ve always known you’re here for…

THEN. LET’S. FUCKING. GO.

Join me Sunday, June 15th from 11am-1pm EST on Zoom to get to the guts of your current (and/or ongoing) situation.

We will bridge the seeming divide between you and your money.

The ‘solution’ is simple,

and profound.

Sign up for the group money talk this Sunday, or book a private call to clear it all.

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How To Get It All (An Essay)

It is your own (perceived) inner division that seemingly separates you from what you want and already are.

There is nothing but consciousness.

So the degree to which you are split within, is the degree to which you perceive lack without.

If you knew and experienced yourself to be God (which you are while in human form), there would be no inner division.

You’d be operating from truth.

From ultimate knowing.

And reaping the gold that comes from that state.

You wouldn’t be waiting, hoping, wishing, praying.

You wouldn’t try.

You wouldn’t be on a path of healing and becoming.

You’d just be BEING what you already are and have always been.

No split.

So…

the work as a human is to bridge that divide.

To get on board with the God that you are.

And you do this by facing and seeing through every single lie that tells you you’re less than everything -

and convinces you that you’re more than nothing.

Because it’s both.

And it’s neither.

It’s just an empty moment that houses all of eternity.

Play with me in the ethers.

One call to bridge the illusory divide

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Bothered By Billionaires? (An Essay)

If you feel some type of way about other people making a lot of money,

or spend any amount of time and energy judging others for how they make or spend it (yes, even those billionaires you love to hate and love to blame for all that’s wrong in our ‘capitalist’ world),

you’re only outing yourself by projecting the lack of freedom and power YOU feel to generate the kind of life and money YOU truly desire to move through this world in a way that feels incredible to YOU.

Because if you were already doing that, you wouldn’t waste your time and energy focusing on what other equally free and sovereign beings are choosing to do with what they’ve created.

It’s insane that you are more bothered by what other people are doing than by the fact that you’re not doing what you know you’re here to do at the level you know you’re capable of.

LIKE WAKE UP.

Your choice to live small, and I’m not talking financially but that as well if it applies, is why you get so pissed at ‘the rich’ while simultaneously complaining about being / feeling ‘poor’, when what you ultimately want is financial freedom / to feel internally rich, but how can that be available to you when you judge the exact thing you desire?

How about instead of pointing at them, you sort out that internal conflict and start cleaning up your shit.

And maybe that includes a call with me.

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Don't Delete That Post (An Essay)

I had a call with a hottie who made an offer online…

a TRUE offer

not an offer to ‘get’

just truth being expressed in a moment

which was an absolute edge for her

because she had ‘exposed’ herself by doing so

and when ‘nothing happened’ (impossible)

when her so-called ‘bold’ offer (bold only to her because of said edge in that moment) wasn’t responded to right away by her audience (silly human thinking it knows the when or the how and thinking something is ‘wrong’ if things don’t ‘happen’ in a specific way on some arbitrary timeline decided by the very small human mind)…

she felt so insecure and anxious about her offer (made in a moment of truth - making it the ultimate success regardless of next),

that she wanted to delete her post.

But if she was on a call with me of all people, what she actually wanted was to ride her edge even further.

I told her the only thing she needs to do is be with her (temporary) internal chaos and do what needs to be done until it’s still inside.

Because the issue isn’t the offer or the ‘lack’ of response from her audience.

The opportunity is to be bigger than the internal noise and external appearances.

To not move while the mind moves and while nothing seems to be moving ‘out there’.

To not act in response to the chatter of an unharnessed mind that has no idea what the fuck is actually going on.

#thehumanmindcanbesodumb

To be in charge of what’s happening ‘in here’, regardless of externals (and the mind is an external).

She was ready.

She stayed still.

She didn’t delete her offer.

And she made her biggest sale in business so far.

(100K)

P.S. If she, once still inside, STILL chose to delete her post, that would have been perfect and TRUE; not reactionary and compensatory. And, if she deleted it at the start because of her anxiety, it’s not like she would have ‘lost’ a thing. Everything is used and makes us more. She could have posted it again the next day (or even an hour later) or right after our call from a more solid place. Get it? It’s never about the thing itself. It’s about what you’re doing inside yourself with whatever is happening and not happening.

P.P.S. If you’re ready to go beyond your human bullshit so you can taste and touch what you know you’re actually here for, book a call with me here and we can chat til there’s nothing left.

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Dollars Can't Measure Rich Or Poor (An Essay)

Being in poverty isn’t about not having money.

Although that can be a natural expression and extension of it.

Just like being truly rich isn’t about having a certain amount of money, although of course it can include a fuckton of it.

Poverty is just a deviation from what’s natural.

From who you really are.

You can be impoverished in any area.

In many areas beyond just fininacial.

You can have all the money you need and desire, and still be poor where it counts.

You can move through this world without a dollar to your name, and still be rich as fuck.

Dollars aren’t the indicator of rich or poor.

Except, of course, when they are.

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Normal Isn't Natural (An Essay)

It’s not natural to be overweight.

It demonstrates (and further creates) imbalance.

It’s not natural to live in poverty.

It demonstrates (and further creates) imbalance.

It’s not natural to be in perpetual pain.

It demonstrates (and further creates) imbalance.

It’s not natural to be mentally ill.

It demonstrates (and further creates) imbalance.

It’s not natural to be sedentary / immobile.

It demonstrates (and further creates) imbalance.

It’s not natural to be addicted.

It demonstrates (and further creates) imbalance.

Just because it’s normal and normalized…

Just because we can (and do) adapt to every dysfunction…

Living in a state of perpetual compensation is not a natural way to be.

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Eat The Poison If You Want To (An Essay)

You can eat whatever you want without ‘negative’ consequences when you exist in truth.

But most people don’t.

Much, if not all, of their life is a compensation.

Therefore, so is their eating.

Eating to soothe.

To control.

To get.

To lose.

To fill what’s empty.

When it’s not even their tummy.

That’s not living in truth.

That’s not being in charge of you or your food.

It’s the food leading you.

Oh, boy.

Or rather, your need to compensate makes you a slave to the external - in this case, food.

So yes, theoretically you can eat whatever you want when you live in truth, without any adverse consequences.

Just like that guru I heard about decades ago who took a hit of acid and was unaffected by it because he was energetically above the chemicals.

He didn’t go on a trip.

But experientially, almost no one exists at such a level where they could consume acid or whatever the fuck any have their system be completely unaffected.

Truth overrides all things, yes.

But again, most people don’t choose and live from truth.

They choose from compensation.

And people who choose to live from truth don’t need or desire to consume a specific thing just to prove they can.

“Lemme drink some of this bleach to show you how unaffected I am.”

No.

Truth-living isn’t about self-poisoning.

But if ‘poison’ was consumed,

they wouldn’t notice.

It would neutralize.

Their system would self-correct.

Naturally.

Or at the very least,

they’d take the steps to clean it out.

And return to purity once again.

Or they’d croak.

Who knows.

Circle of life and all that.

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Going Too Far Is Still Not Far Enough

I love going ‘too far’.

I love when others react to that.

I love when me just being me activates and overwhelms someone.

Because I know what’s going on.

And yes, that turns me on.

While many avoid that tension, that edge, that illusory risk of offending or ‘losing’ someone by saying or doing the true thing regardless of any and every thing else,

I’m over here like BRING. IT. THE. FUCK. ON.

I go right into it.

And yes, most people collapse (well, their false self does, as it should and must).

And yes, I love that, too.

Their illusory walls can’t withstand the truth so of course they crumble until they don’t.

And the ones who actually want to be free of themselves,

who genuinely crave that level of liberation,

who are willing to see behind the veil of illusion they were holding so tightly to,

(even and especially by painting me in a tainted light to justify their own frustration at not yet fully owing themselves)

end up loving me for precisely what they previously judged me for…

Being exactly as I am.

Which ‘forced’ them to do the same.

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No Offence But You're Insane

If you’re human, you’re mentally ill.

You don’t need a diagnosis to prove that.

Just look what goes on inside your mind.

If every bit of it was projected onto a screen for you and others to read 24/7,

you’d see that you’re insane.

Not truly.

But mentally.

Disordered.

Not coherent.

And…

coherence is still the baseline.

It’s the undercurrent of all things.

And the noise of the mind is just that.

Noise.

And…

the noise is not who you are.

It’s just what’s going on above the stillness.

And…

the noise itself is not a problem.

Identifying with the noise IS.

Believing the noise is who you are IS.

Being taken on that insane ride to crazytown whenever the noise takes over IS.

And of course, none of it is really a problem at all.

It’s just what IS.

For now.

And…

sanity IS an option.

By seeing that the noise is only noise.

Regardless of what it contains.

And that you are the one who listens.

The peace beneath the noise.

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I Dreamed I Was A Daughter Of The Moon


I asked him, "What am I?"

He said I was a moth.

I asked him why I couldn't be a butterfly (I had always been a butterfly), but he said he didn't know.

I desperately wanted to make love to him, and I wanted to be made love to.

But he was a human and I was a moth.

A strange and frustrating thing.

So I hovered and fluttered around his neck as he led me up the stairs, and when he felt my winged kisses, he, too, was aroused.

He knew I was trespassing.

I knew he was forbidden.

I wasn't allowed to join him here, and not in this way, to be sure.

But these were not our rules.

They were not of our making.

Least of all, sane.

These rules belonged to the others.

The dim and unaware.

They did not apply to those whose sights transcended their limits.

They did not apply to creatures like he and I.

Our connection was strong.

Tenderly overwhelming.

We were destined to merge.

Our goal: become one.

And being that he was already a part of that world, while secretly being a part of mine, he cared enough to take me where I didn't belong.

He was privy to the path.

They'd never suspect a thing.

They'd only suspect me - the moth - a tender loving thing.

He looked like the others but to them, I was strange.

For being what I was.

For wanting what I want.

For going where they would not dare.

But he understood.

I only wanted to go higher.

I wanted to know more.

And I wanted him in his entirety.

He did not question my intentions.

He knew they were pure.

He did not question our differences because he knew we were the same.

He knew what I was, and what I was, was his.

He knew better than to hinder what he, too, desired for himself.

He conspired to make it happen.

And what mattered most is that he let me love him.

Let me touch him.

Let me follow this wild dream.

And I could not have been more grateful.

After holding back for what felt like an eternity,

with the whole universe pulsating within me,

I had nowhere to go but beyond all I'd ever known.

I desired him with a vengeance.

To devour every bit that I could.

I hungered for our union before reality woke us up.

Small as I was, my presence was known and felt.

My being was needed and craved.

And my touch turned him into mine as I sought to taste the places where he'd feel me the most deeply.

He, the human.

Me, the moth.

We, the illuminated.

Originally written and publicly shared in 2016.

And yes, this was an actual dream I had about a fellow at the time.

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The $1700 Edge (One Minute Clip)

Watch the captioned video above or listen to the downloadable link below.


TRANSCRIPT

Her: “I’m testing the boundaries at the moment. I’m working with another teacher who you know, and just before I made an offer on this MasterClass, I had a session with her, and she had tested me and said, “Okay. Well, what do you feel comfortable offering?” kind of thing, and I felt like I handled it quite well. But I really struggled when it came to yours because there was nobody holding my hand, but I pushed myself with it as well. You were like, “Offer what’s true.” and I sat there with it and then I felt for my edges and I got to this point and I was like, “Oh, my God. I’m gonna do this thing on top of this other thing. I just did that and then I’m gonna do this”. And I was like but this is the only thing that feels right. Like I can’t, I couldn’t offer you anything else. There was nothing else I could give you that would be true. And I was just like okay, this is where I gotta go.”

Mandyland Radio is on Spotify, SoundCloud, iTunes, iHeartRadio, TikTok, Pinterest, YouTube and most other streaming platforms.

Book a private call to be fully exposed and beautifully destroyed.

Explore the Mandyland Radio Archives (from 2010 to now).

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Mandy Bites On In/Sanity

  1. Batshit sane.

  2. Almost no one wants to go all the way.

  3. The saner you are, the more insane you (and they) appear.

  4. How do you know you're insane? You want this moment, this situation, this person to be different.

  5. Stop interacting with it as if it's real.

  6. He’s caught in the delusion he’s at the mercy of his beast.

  7. When you’re attached to form, you suffer. When you’re devoted to truth, you fly.

  8. It’s the inability to withstand the intense aliveness of being that drives the impulse to dilute or run from it, just as the inability to withstand it drives the impulse to seek that same jolt of aliveness through superficial means.

  9. When someone is free, they appear narcissistic to those still bound by themselves.

  10. You can’t reason with insanity.

  11. It’s all your own (un)doing.

  12. Sanity is the new black.

  13. The line between truth and delusion is imperceptible to most.

  14. Human: runs from the present / dwells on the non-existent past / fears the illusory future / perpetually resists what IS (and suffers because of it) / consistently holds back truth / avoids making the true move / believes things, others, and life need(s) to be a certain way in order to feel okay / creates and then lives within endless, baseless, utterly insane stories / denies its sovereignty / blames the world and others and pretends to be a victim / takes zero responsibility for the creation and quality of its own experience / looks out instead of in… | Being: “And you wonder why you feel like shit?”

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Mandy Bites On Love

  1. If there’s an exchange, it isn’t pure.

  2. Breakups don't break what needs breaking.

  3. There is no workaround.

  4. I love myself. I love being free of myself.

  5. What’s to love when you’re free of yourself? Except being free
    of yourself.

  6. Self-love is better than self-hate but being self-less is where it’s at.

  7. It’s not love or fear. It’s love and fear. Love includes the acceptance of fear. And anything else that arises.

  8. It 'falls apart' because it isn't true.

  9. If your goal is to please her, you’re doing two things wrong.

  10. If someone cares what you think of them, or what anybody thinks of them, they cannot be honest with you or them.

  11. All couples have problems. All people who look outside of themselves for something / anything have problems.

  12. #fillinthegapsifyouloveme

  13. Do the work within the current dynamic.

  14. The next one won’t be better. The same work will meet you there, too.

  15. If they run from themselves, they’ll run from you, too.

  16. Resentment is using another to keep yourself bound and blaming them for why you’re not free.

  17. “Hey, I ignored myself. Can you do me a solid and correct it on your end?” What you’re actually saying to someone when you ask or expect them to change.

  18. It’s not about how long it lasts. How long does it remain true?

  19. Why would you need to forgive? What happened wasn’t wrong (it just was). Nor was it about you.

  20. The concept of forgiveness is just as absurd as one human granting it to another.

  21. It’s not real love unless and until you have zero need / expectation / desire for the other to be different in any way.

  22. Speak the truth or walk away. It’s the loving thing to do.

  23. Most would rather have another cater / adapt to their dysfunction(s) / delusion(s) than to do the work necessary to correct it themselves.

  24. I don’t work to keep us together. I work to break things apart.

  25. Love and attachment cannot coexist.

  26. Love is when nothing remains.

  27. The less I care, the more I love.

  28. Loyal to truth; not the other.

  29. Full self-ownership is my kink.

  30. GO. ALL. IN.

  31. Almost no one wants to go all the way.

  32. It’s so silly not to be in love with me.

  33. Hearts don’t break. Attachments do.

  34. If your shit can be fucked with by another making moves, your shit clearly needs a good fucking.

  35. If it’s a NO for your being, it’s a NO for theirs, too. No exceptions.

  36. If with or without doesn't feel the same, your work is to bridge that divide.

  37. Even when I'm single, I move like I'm taken.

  38. No shame. No blame. No fault at all. Just full responsibility for each and every piece.

  39. Others aren’t distracting you. You’re using others to distract yourself.

  40. What I want cannot be bought. Nor found within another.

  41. If you made your dating choices from your lower self, you may be entitled to compensation.

  42. No need to show them the door. They’ll escort themselves out naturally, the closer you stay to you.

  43. The real ‘no contact’ is with the abuser in your head.

  44. Don’t aim for another. Master yourself.

  45. Their moves are not your business.

  46. Exposure is love (mis)perceived as a threat.

  47. You want to be chosen without choosing yourself.

  48. Even when you choose poorly, you still choose perfectly.

  49. I blow shit up endlessly. Because I love you and I love me.

  50. Your willingness and capacity to suffer with and for another, is not love (for yourself or for the other).

  51. Giving to receive isn't giving. It's manipulation.

  52. If there’s nothing left, I’m out. If there’s no thing at all, I’m in.

  53. What’s best for you is what’s best for them.

  54. You cannot be mine if you are not yours.

  55. I cannot be kept. I just stay where it’s true.

  56. Intimacy only exists when you stay.

  57. Matterless love is the purest love there is.

  58. The human wants a particular thing. The being loves (and uses) what is.

  59. It's not true love until there's nothing in the way.

  60. People ‘love’ you more when you suffer. Let that shit sink in.

  61. They ‘love’ you on your way. But not once you arrive.

  62. If you have to dilute yourself for love, it's not love.

  63. If you aren’t fascinated by and obsessed with your lover, then what’s the fucking point?

  64. I’m not here to spread love and light. I’m here to disrupt the grid. I’m here to dig and dismantle. I’m here to make the unknown, known.

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Mandy Bites On Silence / Stillness / s p a c e

  1. I go where it’s the loudest, just to make it quiet.

  2. I don’t move until I’m moved.

  3. Here, right now, is the only place that's true.

  4. The higher you go, the quieter it gets.

  5. No one can take you where no one has gone before.

  6. The only thing that's 'earned' is the state you experience from the work you do to keep that inner non-space pristine.

  7. Death is nothing more than dropping form and remaining formless.

  8. Heaven is THIS; not that. Heaven is HERE; not there.

  9. It’s about how still and spacious you are (and stay) as every piece drops in.

  10. There’s a still point deep inside you. Everything comes from that.

  11. Saying nothing says everything that needs to be said.

  12. She’s most aroused while in the void.

  13. If there’s nothing left, I’m out. If there’s no thing at all, I’m in.

  14. Truth exists, always was, is, and will be, regardless of the noise.

  15. Stillness. Silence. S p a c e. Beneath the chaos, that’s all there is.

  16. When you move, nothing moves. Everything moves when you’re still.

  17. Existing wide awake and never moving IS the happening.

  18. no thing = everything

  19. Purity is the currency.

  20. THIS or nothing + THIS because there’s no thing.

  21. When you see through and exist beyond space and time, it’s a pretty fucking epic ride.

  22. Nothing can bridge the (illusory) consciousness gap. Only no thing can.

  23. Why would you want anything other than what already is?

  24. How could it get better than this when this is all there is?

  25. when there’s no one / when there’s no thing / when you’re empty / then you’ll see

  26. Nothing is sacred unless everything is.

  27. Every question answers itself.

  28. What feels like magic is just you unobstructed.

  29. Nothing needs to be added. What’s removed is what changes the game.

  30. The more that’s removed, the more there is.

  31. Let there be nothing. It's the breeding ground for more.

  32. You’re here to clear the atmosphere.

  33. In the void, you’re free.

  34. Anything that isn’t truth, that isn’t you, is clutter.

  35. Them: “What do you do for a living?” Me: “Float through space.”

  36. It takes so little to play with me. But most are filled with so much.

  37. Your system is naturally self-cleaning.

  38. I was terrified there would be nothing left. But when nothing was left, I was free.

  39. Your job isn’t done until the matter is gone.

  40. as empty as empty can be

  41. All things exist to be made pure.

  42. Love is when nothing remains.

  43. The deepest truths apply across the board. They’re simple, obvious, light.

  44. from the depths / from the silence / from the world beyond this one

  45. Nothing is missing.

  46. I’m here to keep flying in the face of what IS. To want nothing different from the moment I’m in.

  47. home is where i am / and where i’ve always been

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Mandy Bites On Self-Abandonment

  1. Exhaustion comes from self-abandonment (a lack of integrity) while dealing with other people; not from dealing with other people.

  2. The more you self-abandon, the more symptomatic you become.

  3. All you’re doing with all that doing is dancing around your own fire.

  4. You only point at others when you’ve turned against yourself.

  5. Your habitual state is not your natural state.

  6. It’s all your own (un)doing.

  7. If you weren't trying to outsource from another what you can only provide for yourself, you would not have ended up in something that hurts you.

  8. To blame the ‘narcissist’ for ‘manipulating’ you into ignoring that initial gut feeling and your brilliant inner knowing is completely absurd.

  9. Why are you mad at them for your choice to betray yourself?

  10. Your system inevitably screams NO when you've ignored its multiple whispers.

  11. “Things were never the same after that.” After you stayed when you should have left.

  12. If you do it ‘for’ or ‘because’, it's not IT.

  13. Others aren’t distracting you. You’re using others to distract yourself.

  14. If you choose something or someone over yourself, you're gonna have a hard time.

  15. It all goes out the window in the face of what is.

  16. It’s the inability to withstand the intense aliveness of being that drives the impulse to dilute or run from it, just as the inability to withstand it drives the impulse to seek that same jolt of aliveness through superficial means.

  17. We only feel the need to ‘escape’ when we’re existing unnaturally.

  18. It hurts so you can learn how to not do that shit that hurts you.

  19. Regardless of the ‘issue’, it’s about your relationship to power.

  20. The other isn't the reason that you deviate from YOU. The other is the excuse you use to abandon what is true.

  21. You only need to 'cope' when you choose to leave home.

  22. You want to leave because you’ve yet to fully own YOU. And there’s no greater pain than that.

  23. One must abandon themselves in the attempt to fill through external means what can only be satisfied internally through learning how to not self-abandon in the first place.

  24. What's a little more poison when you're already sick?

  25. You want to be chosen without choosing yourself.

  26. Living inside a NO is one of the helliest hells there is.

  27. It's you putting things in your own way.

  28. Approval seeking aka self-rejecting.

  29. I won't abandon myself for another. No one is worth that transgression.

  30. You get what you say yes to. And all the shit that brings.

  31. Your deepest, most excrutiating pain comes from one thing only.

  32. You lied to yourself before (and more than) they ever lied to you.

  33. Life will force the expansion you’re not willing to take on your own.

  34. You do what you’re told by them. I do what I’m told by me.

  35. You think it’s too risky to be wild. So you’d rather play dead to stay ‘safe’.

  36. The powerless surrender to illusion. The powerful submit to truth.

  37. Your level of pain is equal to your level of resistance. To your genius. To your power. To truth.

  38. You are the only remedy for your suffering.

  39. Waiting on God is waiting on you.

  40. When you deny yourself, you deny God itself. #samething

  41. Obligation is self-imposed.

  42. Follow yourself. Unfollow the rest.

  43. When you aim, you miss.

  44. Stop leaving here to go 'there' and the ‘problem’ dissolves.

  45. You created X when you disowned the truth. When you own the truth, X disappears.

  46. Their maps can’t take you HOME.

  47. Don’t look to me for how to be. You already know what to do.

  48. You’re not at the mercy of the planets.

  49. How to successfully human: 1. Honour external commitments. 2. Ignore internal commands.

  50. Stop buying into your own bullshit and you’ll be just fine.

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