Addiction
People pleasers aren’t any less controlling or manipulative than those who ‘take advantage’ of them.
Both are positioning themselves, and using others, to get their artificial needs met.
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One must abandon themselves in the attempt to ‘fill’ through external means what can only be satisfied internally through learning how to not self-abandon in the first place.
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Whatever the addiction / compulsion is makes no difference.
It’s only ever about one’s relationship to their own power.
Which is perfectly demonstrated / out-pictured through one’s relationship to,
and experience of,
said substance / behaviour / person.
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Your willingness and capacity to suffer with and for another, is not love (for yourself or the other).
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I chose him precisely because of the density.
The grit.
For the perceived dysfunction that would highlight my own so I could erect what had long been limp.
I used him to purify myself.
To be stripped even further.
To stay until nothing was left.
From the outside, it looked insane.
And to my human, it felt like hell.
But obliteration was what I was after.
Why else would I have danced right there.
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The addiction itself is not the issue.
What’s sourcing the pattern of addiction, IS.
And even that is not an issue.
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When you’ve deviated from the truth and natural movements of your being (a complete betrayal to your system), the only way to live with that internal split is to distract yourself with self-created 'issues’ that would not exist (and ultimately don't) had you remained in your power (your natural state) in the first place.
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You 'struggle' where you've yet to own and apply your power.
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Watch the captioned video above or listen to the downloadable link below.
Mandyland Radio is on Spotify, SoundCloud, iTunes, iHeartRadio, TikTok, Pinterest, YouTube and most other streaming platforms.
Purchase select full interviews / private calls that have been featured on the show.
Book a private call to be fully exposed and beautifully destroyed.
Explore the Mandyland Radio Archives (from 2010 to now).
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Watch the captioned video above or listen to the downloadable link below.
Mandyland Radio is on Spotify, SoundCloud, iTunes, iHeartRadio, TikTok, Pinterest, YouTube and most other streaming platforms.
Purchase select full interviews / private calls that have been featured on the show.
Book a private call to be fully exposed and beautifully destroyed.
Explore the Mandyland Radio Archives (from 2010 to now).
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You only need to 'cope' when you choose to leave home.
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Addiction is an energetic pattern.
It’s not about the form / substance / person.
They’re interchangeable.
And until you succeed in shifting what actually needs shifting (which goes beyond just stopping something in the physical), you’ll naturally and inevitably replace one addiction with another.
You’ll unknowingly redirect that same addictive and still very active pattern to another spot (and likely return to the original spot), unaware that the pattern itself bleeds across the board until it actually gets cleaned up.
Even if you do manage to stop A, B or C in the physical, either temporarily or for good (which you take as proof that something has changed - that you have changed),
unless you also make the energetic shift required to dissolve the pattern altogether, nothing has truly changed at all.
You just ‘quit’ that one thing, only to continue the same pattern with this or the next thing, thereby proving that the specific addiction was never the actual issue.
What’s sourcing the pattern of addiction, IS.
And until that’s ‘resolved’ (seen through and turned back into nothing), it’s gonna keep shape shifting and fucking you up.
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Regardless of the ‘issue’, it’s about your relationship to power.
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You only try to fill in the (perceived) gaps for another when you forget that they are sovereign, just like you.
And you can only forget another’s sovereignty when you have forgotten your own (cue a false sense of superiority) which is the only reason you’d ever feel the need to over-reach in the first place.
Your discomfort with where another is choosing to be at (yes, choosing - there are no victims and no one needs saving) generates your over-extension in an attempt to relieve yourself of said discomfort which actually has nothing to do with what the other is or isn’t doing / seeing / getting in that moment.
This is what feeds your desire to change / correct what’s being presented to whatever you deem better / more ‘evolved’ than what they’re currently choosing for themselves,
which inevitably breeds resistance and stagnation; not clarity and movement, because the energy of your so-called help is tainted aka sourced from a false premise to begin with.
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We only feel the need to ‘escape’ when we’re existing unnaturally.
Addiction is the perfect way to ineffectively ‘manage’ the discomfort of that inner deviation.
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You aren’t a victim of a damn thing.
No one and no thing is more powerful than YOU.
But the human condition(ing) will have you believe that your pain and its many manifestations of it, is/are much bigger than you.
When in fact, you created all of your perceived dysfunction (quite brilliantly, I might add) and therefore have exactly what it takes to use your creation as a tool to actively harness the power you relinquished long ago.
The exact reason you created these perceived challenges and limitations in the first place.
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It’s the inability to withstand the intense aliveness of being that drives the impulse to dilute or run from it, just as the inability to withstand it drives the impulse to seek that same jolt of aliveness through superficial means.
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From a recent text chat with my cyber bestie…
Kristen: “People believe they are the thingy.”
Me: “Yes.”
Kristen: “Which is the problem with identifying as an addict because it says I am my thingy.”
Me: “Yep.”
Kristen: “And people with the biggest thingys are often the ones who are most potent.”
Me: “Exactly. They wouldn’t need a thingy so big if they weren’t so powerful.”
Kristen: “But shame is a whole thing, too. Shame is the core thing. It’s the Daddy Thingy.”
Me: “Yep. And the being doesn’t carry shame at all. It’s just another thingy to fuel all the other thingies.”
Kristen: “And things need space held for them.”
Me: “Yep.”
Kristen: “Which eats up space / power.”
Me: “Yep.”
Kristen: “Hungry thingys.”
Me: “Yep lol”
Kristen: “Insatiable thingys.”
Me: “Feed all the thingies!”
Kristen: “lol”
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Doing or not doing won’t correct what needs correcting.
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