Essays

Touché, Bitch (An Essay)

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Talking with a friend in a relationship that’s been the biggest NO forfuckingever…

Her: “But I love his family.”

Me: “More than you love yourself?”

Her: “Touché, bitch.”

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P.S. If you’ve never referred to me as ‘bitch’ (not ‘a bitch’ - although that would still be a compliment), do you even love me?

And if I haven’t called you ‘bitch’ while hyped up in a private convo / message / work call, either celebrating you or calling you out, do I even love you?

Of course.

But it’s still fun to ponder.

Sanna On Anger (A Transcript)

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From one of Sanna’s lives:

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I don’t get angry.

But that’s because I actually trust my No.

An emotion like anger, like frustration, comes because you’ve overextended your No.

You’ve surrendered even though you’ve known that the thing is a No.

And the longer you surrender after sensing that something is a No, the more unstable your energy becomes, and eventually you get angry or frustrated.

But for me it doesn’t come to that.

Because as soon as something is a No, I say No.

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watch the full video (57:43)

Peep The Sanna Collection

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Trust No One (An Essay)

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Ultimately,

I don’t trust anybody.

I don’t need to.

I trust my knowing.

I trust myself.

And therefore, every move by proxy.

Which is why…

I don’t require another to be ‘trustworthy’.

I know when truth is present and when it’s not.

Which has nothing to do with the person.

And everything to do with the now.

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A Collection of Sanna Quotes

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  1. They have to go through fire and hell to get to you.

  2. I’m not compassionate towards illusion.

  3. It goes from a hurricane to a surgical knife. 

  4. The thrill you’re seeking isn’t a physical one. It’s energetic. 

  5. It is impossible to submit, to descend all the way, and not receive the unimaginable. 

  6. Surrender is settling for what you can’t submit to. 

  7. You’re either in a container regurgitating content, or you’re in a frame creating art.

  8. Nothing that is truly in integrity, can be contained, managed, or maintained.

  9. A leader's only ‘duty’ is to create at the edge of their own consciousness. 

  10. The more powerful the frame is, the less you have to do in the physical. 

  11. If something is true, there is no risk of it falling apart.

View the full and ever-growing Sanna Quotes collection on Pinterest and/or Facebook.

Read full pieces in The Sanna Collection.

Meet Sanna.

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Obliteration Dance (An Essay)

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I chose him precisely because of the density.

The grit.

For the perceived dysfunction that would highlight my own so I could erect what had long been limp.

I used him to purify myself.

To be stripped even further.

To stay until nothing was left.

From the outside, it looked insane.

And to my human, it felt like hell.

But obliteration was what I was after.

Why else would I have danced right there.

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Mandyland Math (An Essay)

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Right now new ‘math’ is swirling around the internet.

There’s boy math.

Girl math.

Even gay math.

So here’s some Mandyland Math:

1. The less you care, the more you love.

2. What’s in line with the being feels out of line to the human.

3. Everything, and I mean EVERYTHING (especially every so-called ‘bad’ thing), makes you more, regardless of what you’ve ‘lost’.

4. You gotta go where it hurts to feel better.

5. The saner you are, the more insane you (and they) appear.

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The Passive Goodbye (An Essay)

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“I wish things could be different.”

Translation: “I wish I could stay the same and also have you put up with all that entails, but since you’re holding me accountable and I’d need to do the actual work required of me for us to continue, I guess this is the end. But if you change your mind and want to settle for even less in the future, you can always count on me.”

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Your Verbal Line In The Sand (An Essay)

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“You verbally express it because you can’t energetically hold it.”

(Peep this Mandy Bite)

Andrea: “Is this always the case?”

No.

If they’re energetically backed, you can feel the power through the words. But it’s not the words themselves doing the speaking.

It’s the energy.

The words are chosen but are not necessary to deliver the message which is already felt and known with or without the words.

What I’m pointing to in this bite is the use of words (like setting boundaries, for example) with no energetic backing - the reason you’re relying on words to deliver the message in the first place; a message that won’t come through because your energy is saying something else entirely.

Words can’t override the truth of where you are (or aren’t) and make what’s not true, true.

(Peep this Mandy Bite)

Using words in an attempt to achieve what you’ve yet to earn (and wouldn't need to name had you earned and achieved it already), demonstrates that split.

You wouldn’t need to draw a line in the sand with words if the line was energetically there to begin with.

(Peep this Mandy Bite)

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Beyond Your Identity (An Essay)

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the things you identify with

or (mis)perceive yourself to be

your past

your pain

your story

your race

your age

your body

your gender and orientation

your role as this

your status as that

your (fill in the blank) that matters so much

all of these things

at the deepest level

are not who you actually are

and the more strongly you identify with whatever it is

and get heated as you protest for or against it

or heaven forbid

attempt to protect it

(because who would you be without ‘it’)

the further you are

from the ultimate truth

hence your need to identify

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The Myth Of Detachment (An Essay)

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Being detached doesn’t equal being unfeeling.

In fact, the less that’s in the way (the less matter aka attachment there is), the more deeply you feel precisely because the moment / experience / person / relationship isn’t being filtered through a dense / matter-filled lens, thereby providing the richest, deepest and most purified dance through each moment of life.

When you can see things and others for what they truly are (pure energy), without the overlay of human distortion / judgement / attachment / need,

and you know viscerally (not just intellectually) that when you truly don’t care about or buy into the illusions that almost everyone holds tight to (which can make you appear cold and heartless to those still mired in non-existent shit),

you’re primed for potency and possess the capacity to experience and feel it ALL.

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Raw Dogging Life (An Essay)

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No matter what anyone is selling you,

it ain’t IT.

Others can point to IT,

be a demonstration of IT (at best),

but the IT you seek comes from one thing only:

daring to be present enough in your own experience (no matter what it contains) to do the actual work of facing, feeling and seeing right through whatever shit is in the way of your heaven.

Raw-dogging life.

No buffer.

It’s as simple and as hard as that.

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The Unwritten Tagline (An Essay)

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The unwritten tagline of most coaches:

“I’ll take you to a place I haven’t even dared to go myself and I’ll use a bunch of words and embellishments and contrived positioning to convince you that I’ve got whatchu need and you’ll buy it because you can’t yet discern between what I’m saying and how I’m actually living / being which is precisely why you’re captivated by my bullshit in the first place. Thank you for your payment.”

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Surrender vs Submission (An Essay)

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In his brilliant work (The Untethered Soul, Living Untethered, The Michael Singer Podcast), Michael Singer uses the word ‘surrender’ (a lot) for what is actually full submission (aka ‘going blind’, as he noted so accurately).

But words are just words.

It’s the energy that speaks.

And his energy speaks volumes.

Typically when others speak and write of surrender, I cringe a little because you can feel the powerlessness in it.

They’re expressing from a passive / hopeful state.

It’s a giving up.

A handing over.

A feeling of defeat.

At times it’s even manipulative.

It’s: ‘I’ll do this so I can get that.”

It’s pretending not to care while caring very much.

It’s pretending to let go while waiting for it to come.

The energy of surrender is powerless.

The energy of submission however…

is PURE. FUCKING. POWER.

It’s actively remaining still.

It’s fully engaged.

It’s a deeply felt KNOWing.

Even when it appears like nothing is ‘happening’.

Existing wide awake and never moving IS the happening.

Submission is being erect / intact / discerning.

Which is the opposite of surrender.

It’s actually never surrendering.

It’s never deviating from one’s Self.

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Consistency Isn't Required (An Essay)

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Consistency in the physical isn’t required when you’re energetically intact.

When you’re in complete integrity with yourself, you create consistency on the only level that matters, and your system (and every extension of it) works more efficiently than you can imagine regardless of how things are or aren’t ‘adding up’ externally.

This doesn’t mean that being in integrity can’t also include consistency in the physical.

You just aren’t reliant on contrived external movements (moves sourced from ulterior motives) to ‘achieve’ your so-called results.

Because here’s a fun fact:

The best ‘results’ come from ‘dissolving’ inner resistance (seeing through matter which turns it right back to nothing); not from applying force externally in an attempt to compensate for the accumulation of matter that’s creating said resistance.

That same inner resistance you’re trying to ‘overcome’ and override by doing all the things, is the only (illusory) thing you actually need to ‘work on’.

The rest takes care of itself.

When you are free of that inner resistance,

free of the need to manage things in the physical,

free of the impulse to ‘make’ things happen,

you’ll naturally move in ways that are beneficial to you.

You’ll instinctively be led to whatever movements (or non-movements - same thing) that will further your mission to be and remain intact, regardless of what you do or don’t do.

This ultimately lands you in the perfect spots ‘out there’ as well, which simply can’t happen when you focus exclusively on what you’re doing externally without questioning why you feel the need to do those things in the first place.

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Deviating From What's Natural (An Essay)

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When you’ve deviated from the truth and natural movements of your being (a complete betrayal to your system), the only way to live with that internal split is to distract yourself with self-created 'issues’ that would not exist (and ultimately don't) had you remained in your power (your natural state) in the first place.

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