Essays

The Infinite Investment (An Essay)

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it is impossible to ‘waste’

time

money

energy

your life

—

all of it is an investment

no matter how it’s spent

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Her: “Even if invested with the wrong people?”

Me: “Wrong aka exactly right for where you were when you chose ‘wrong’, or else you would have chosen ‘right’ instead (which you did anyways because there is no ‘wrong’)

Her: “What if I knew it was wrong and still chose the same a few times over like a loop until I got it? Not a waste of time?”

Me: “Right. That training ground is not a waste because it leads you to stop that loop. It doesn’t matter how many times you loop. Eventually, you won’t.”

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Breakthroughs Aren't Enough (An Essay)

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Just like you wouldn’t expect one meal to satiate you for a week,

or one shower to keep you clean for a month,

or one workout to keep you fit for life,

or one deep clean of your place to magically make it so that you never need to clean again,

you can’t expect the inner work to take care of itself once-and-for-all just because you had some sort of breakthrough.

It’s a progressive cleaning up.

And you can’t get to the maintenance part until you’ve dealt with all the accumulation.

So yes, it gets ‘easier’ as you chip away at all that you’re not,

but you will never reach a point where you’re done the work and are good-to-go for life.

The work is done for life.

Because there are always more ways and more opportunities to sharpen, to deepen, to expand, to refine.

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About That Coldplay Moment (An Essay)

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Posted by a friend on Facebook:

“You have to wonder why the demise of two families at a Coldplay concert is shared more than the tragedies going on around the world. Such a sad state of the world.”

Her friend chimes in:

“I agree 100%. I also don't find anything funny about it. People's lives have been destroyed by this, and its being treated like a joke?”

My take:

Exposing truth doesn’t destroy families.

It liberates everyone involved.

It was the hiding that was destructive.

Now each person is free to choose.

Also,

everyone laughed because it was comedy gold.

Duh.

It was a moment in time that brought everyone together.

So rare.

Whereas “tragedies going on around the world” are happening 24/7/365.

The comparison is silly.

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People Aren't Here To Understand You (An Essay)

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People aren’t here to understand you.

Nor are you here to be understood.

This doesn’t mean you aren’t, or can’t be, understood.

But it’s not required.

And…

it’s impossible to be fully understood

and seen

by another anyways.

(with one exception)

Slivers?

Absolutely.

The entirety?

Absolutely not.

Not only because most people can’t see straight in the first place,

(their view is skewed by conditioning, filters, judgments, the mind, desires, and other distortions that make it impossible to see themselves, let alone life, the moment or another, purely and accurately, so they have no choice but to view you through the limited lens of themselves)

but also because we are all moving and evolving constellations.

Your loved one may understand this moment’s iteration of you and not the next.

They may be open to you today and closed off to you tomorrow for reasons that have nothing to do with you.

So to base your experience of being / feeling loved on…

being understood by another,

feeling seen by another,

having another human show up in a particular way that hits the spot just right,

on another human at all,

is to put unnecessary weight onto something that isn’t required in the first place.

You don’t need to be understood.

And it’s wonderful when you are.

And…

by the time you don’t actually care about being seen or understood,

and you *are* seen and understood,

it doesn’t impact a thing.

Because it makes no difference at all.

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The Power of Mobility (An Essay)

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Mobility work is the same as inner work.

Doing it automatically shows you where you’re currently deficient / limited / stuck / living with dysfunction.

And you get to come face-to-face with the adaptations you’ve created in order to cope with that imbalance.

Just like chiro / physio / stretching / rolling doesn’t actually address the core issue,

tools to manage your inner experience are no different.

They can provide temporary relief from the results of your on-going neglect and immobility, but it creates a dependency on something external that doesn’t actually ‘fix’ the ‘problem’.

And…

it’s not that there’s anything fundamentally wrong with any of these things.

They may be the perfect things along the way, or in a specific season, as you begin to trust yourself more and eventually wean yourself off of these external bandaids that you lean on for support.

And when they are used not as a compensation,

but as a beautiful addition to an already solid and functioning system,

even better.

But the work is ultimately about no longer taking and settling for shortcuts when you are fully capable of,

and are completely designed for,

true stability and self-reliance.

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The Atmosphere of Money (An Essay)

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money

like every other aspect of your life

is either being used and experienced

as an extension and expression of truth

or as a compensation

this is why it doesn’t matter what the amount is

or even how it’s moving

spending / saving / investing / earning

even the terms themselves don’t matter

because energetically,

there is no dividing line

there’s just the environment in which you’re playing the game of money

(or of anything else)

is it restrictive or is it free-flowing?

is there fear or is there knowing?

how is the overall atmosphere?

that tells you all you need to know

and it tells you more than any money book or guru can

if you are giving out of guilt or obligation or a need to feel good about yourself for said giving

that’s not IT

if you are saving out of a fear of not having enough or because that’s just what you were taught to do

that’s not IT

if you are spending in order to deal with your internal anxiety or to fill that gaping hole inside of yourself

that’s not IT

if you are earning in ways that you are internally and fundamentally opposed to, just for the sake of making money

that’s not IT

if you are trying to earn money in a way that your human wants to, but since it’s not ‘working’, you apply force and effort and self-judgment due to this apparent ‘failure’ (under the assumption that you are right about this thing being the thing that you should make money through)

that’s also not IT

and

as always

whatever is not IT

will always lead to IT

so ALL of it is IT

which means you can never fuck this up

so who fucking cares what wonky shit you have been up to in the game of money up until this point

just keep cleaning it up

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The Narcissist Never Gets Away With It (An Essay)

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the ‘narcissist’

or whatever similar creature

you perceive and experience negatively

and / or feel victimized by

and / or want revenge upon

for all they’ve ‘done’ to ‘you’

(but more accurately, and firstly, and in excess — to themselves)

never ‘gets away with it’

they are living 24-7 in that torturous internal prison that ‘makes’ them do the ‘incomprehensible’

and what you experienced

as horrific as it was

while being caught in that twisted web that you did in fact sign up for

(at the deepest level, of course, to access your own salvation by erecting yourself even further)

was only the echo

the overflow

a tiny portion of

a much larger war going on

you were just a casualty

as it were

a necessary

and impersonal

canvas to bleed upon

which was your ‘job’

(obviously)

to take what was given

at the hands of the sickest

and

being caught in that crossfire

of another’s externalized internal war

while gross and seemingly ‘unforgivable’

(but we don’t need to ‘forgive’ in these parts, remember?)

there is nothing you could do

or orchestrate to have done to them

that would be ‘worse’ than what they are already experiencing

and doing to themselves

ab-so-lute-ly nothing

and how you were affected by their split from who they are

(but even more accurately — by how you split from yourself in order to ‘withstand’ it)

is so inconsequential

not just because they don’t care

but because the level of pain

disconnection

confusion and density

that they habitually operate from

leaves zero room

to consider you

(or anyone else for that matter)

beyond their own

incessant need

to meet their needs

that are never met

because no matter what they do

and no matter how hard they try

they cannot quell

that emptiness

that repeatedly swallows them whole

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Owing 52K In Taxes (An Essay)

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“I was expecting and saving for 20-25k in taxes but certainly didn’t expect that to be doubled. But it didn’t phase me and still doesn’t. There was even something hot about seeing the money go. And though I have had to cool it on the bigger spontaneous purchases, I have not changed anything else about my lifestyle. I still feel wealthy. And love seeing the account growing again.”

The above message I received today is what REAL ‘money freedom’ looks and feels like.

Having ZERO hang ups or illusions about money so that you’re cool no matter what and you know how to ‘make’ whatever the fuck you want.

This hottie owed 52K in taxes this year and she had 56K between two accounts and paid her debt it in full (HOT) and didn’t fucking flinch over how ‘little’ remained (SUPER HOT).

THIS is what MY work is about.

FREEDOM. ON. EVERY. LEVEL.

Because ‘money freedom’ is not about fucking money.

And yes, it includes money.

But it’s not about the accumulation of it.

And yes, you can stack as many dollars as you like.

REAL ‘money freedom’ is about the truth of it.

It’s about seeing through your own bullshit that’s in the way of it moving as freely and as naturally as it’s meant to.

And feeling so certain in your power and ability to generate it,

that even if all that money ‘goes away’ for a hot second,

it’s no biggie because you know how money ACTUALLY works so you never fear ‘losing’ it or not having ‘enough’ of it.

If this is how you want to exist,

(and you already do when you have zero shit in the way)

and how you wanna play with dollars,

(and everything else in your life)  

and true freedom is your North Star,

(not the fucking money)

I’m the bitch you wanna talk to.

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Read This If You Don't Trust Yourself (An Essay)

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if you trust yourself

if you are in complete integrity with yourself

(aka you listen and obey)

if you do the work

(aka progressively bridge the gap between you and YOU until YOU are the one in charge of you)

well then you fucking win at life

and…

since none (or very few) of us were raised to win this kind of game

it’s not habitual

even though it’s 100% natural

so there is no shame / blame / fault / judgement

if you do not yet fully trust yourself

if you are not yet in complete integrity with yourself

aka you don’t listen and obey like it’s your full-time job

but no matter where you’re at

you are already doing the work

aka progressively bridging the gap between you and YOU

just by being alive

and moving through your life

and eventually

and inevitably

the integrity and self-trust follows

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Don't Hire A Mentor Unless... (An Essay)

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A while back I was messaging with a hottie who was telling me about her experience with a mentor we both know.

And she mentioned how it didn’t ‘work’.

But like…

only one thing actually works and you can’t get that ‘from’ a mentor or anyone else.

And typically those who pay to work with mentors (at least from what I’ve seen in the space I’ve moved through and out of),

are those who already don’t trust themselves and are looking outside of themselves for answers,

and they are hoping that this next mentorship / person / course / whatever the fuck will be that golden ticket that can override the work that only they can do.

But no one can do it for you.

No one’s ‘paradigm’ can save you from yourself if what you truly want is to be free of yourself and of all paradigms.

#theultimatemission

You’re either meeting and facing and working with what’s already inside of you in each moment or you’re not.

There are no tricks or tools or techniques that can help you do that specific thing.

But there are plenty of them if you want to feel like you’re doing something along the way.

And I’m stating the obvious here: no one on this planet is responsible for what you do or don’t do inside of yourself and with your life.

If you were / are leaning on, and looking to, another person,

instead of erecting, and daring to look inside, yourself,

you’re going to end up disappointed.

(but only until you see through why you felt the need to do that in the first place, and then you will see that it was absolutely perfect)

So…

If you are hiring someone to ‘get’ something,

(not the vibe)

that is your first clue that you’re signing up for shit that won’t do shit for you except be an experience that you will look back on to realize that you abandoned yourself and ignored your knowing because you thought someone else knew or had something you don’t.

You were looking for permission to trust what you already know.

And to do what you already wanted to do.

But you don’t need a mentor for that.

And…

Paying to play with someone for the fun and the thrill and the pleasure and the truth of it…

is another thing entirely.

DO THAT.

And…

it’s not ultimately a problem that you looked, or continue to look, to others for what is already available inside of you.

Because eventually and inevitably,

you won’t do that anymore.

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Frame And Submit (An Essay)

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Most people want the thing (whatever it is) without actually having to submit to themselves.

Moment-by-moment.

Not just once or once in a while.

That’s why they do / try all the things to ‘get’ the thing EXCEPT the only thing that works.

They’ll try everything BUT that.

Well…

that’s not even accurate.

You can’t ‘try’ to submit.

You either do it or you don’t.

And most people don’t because it’s wild as fuck and the noise or the silence is too much to withstand.

They want the comfort of the known while craving the unknown and then curse the gods for what they can’t ‘get’.

And…

Your current and forevermore work is to erect yourself enough to frame every aspect of yourself and your life so that each piece is clean and truly sourced from you.

From truth;

not from compensation.

And most people won’t do that.

Many don’t even care to do that.

But if you’re hungry for the potent purity that is YOU,

the only way to ‘get’ IT,

is to submit.

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