So here's the scoop: there once was a fella in Mandyland who lied about being in an open relationship with his lady.
He's gone now.
Things ended immediately and I'm suuuuuper grateful he and I never got to the point of actually getting it on while he was taken because I would have hated to have participated in the betrayal of another woman - even without knowing.
Anyways, like I mentioned in my post about Relationship Anarchy, there are often yummy things going on in Mandyland so the ending of one thing just opens the door for something even better.
In fact, the day after the truth came out with the guy whose pants were on fire, I stumbled across this fellow on Tinder who had indicated on his profile that he's polyamorous.
You see? This is how it's supposed to be. Being honest and upfront is not rocket science. It's easy peasy if you're a decent person who isn't looking for ways to be a douche in life.
Of course this doesn't mean that this fella and I will click in person when we meet on the weekend, but we're starting out on the same page so at least there's actually a possibility for progression if we have a good vibe together.
Normal and sane, right?
What's not normal and sane is lying to those you love either outright or by withholding important information.
That's a dick move, bro.
Cheating is cheating and it's such a horrible thing to do to someone and if you're participating in said cheating knowingly (on either end), I think you suck.
I have always had friends that cheat on their partners (womp womp) and it's awful to see. I know it's nothing new but it's just not right.
It's something I will never respect or support or get involved in because adults are expected to act like grown ups, you know? Is it really that hard to be honest and open? Like, come on!
Everyone has their stories and their reasons for every one of their transgressions, I know, but that doesn't make it right to betray another.
If you can't be honest about what you need or what's no longer working for you with someone you love or are in a relationship with, well then maybe you're with the wrong someone and maybe you should get the hell out of that relationship and do what makes you happy with whoever makes you happy.
Or just stay single and play with whoever you want like I do so no one gets hurt and no secrets need to be kept.
WHY DOES THAT EVEN NEED TO BE RECOMMENDED?
It's common sense.
Fuck the "it's complicated" bullshit. LIFE is complicated but you ALWAYS have a choice to be an honourable person with integrity. It's possible, you know. People do it every day.
You can choose not to do something that YOU KNOW IN YOUR HEART IS WRONG.
Or maybe you feel justified so it feels right and good to you or you're turned on by the drama of it all. I don't know. I'll never get it.
Honesty is hella sexy to me. Like YUMMERS!
Keeping secrets isn't sexy. It's juvenile. It's not being a big enough person to claim and honour your truth and ask for what you want and need like a grown up should. There's nothing exciting about that.
I have had friends in the past want me to lie on their behalf so they could go betray their partner and use me as their alibi. No fucking way. Own your shit, will ya?
I also lost a dear friendship last Christmas because I spoke truth when I should not have about a horrible secret that was playing out right in front of my eyes and the eyes of many others.
I've missed her a lot since then, but after this situation I don't miss her anymore because why would I even want a friend who is 100% comfortable with lies and deception and dishonouring another female (the oblivious wife) and ending our friendship because I'm not comfortable with that kinda thing. #overit
So if you're a cheater, you might want to never let me know because I can't be trusted to lie on your behalf. Why? Because it's wrong and that's not friendship. I'm not friends with people I need to deceive for. I am not made of that messy stuff.
If I'm asked, I will speak truthfully.
My allegiance is to the truth; not to remaining loyal through deception.
Yeah, I know that's not "girl code" but I only adhere to "Mandyland Code".
Why? Because people DESERVE the truth. They deserve respect. They deserve to know what the hell is going on.
So don't be a dick.
With love and a cyber slap if you need one to smarten up,
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