Although I typically hate using my personal Facebook account these days (except to tag pics from my public page) because I dread inbox messages (I only like to engage publicly, not privately, on FB with very few exceptions) and the content of my feed usually drives me nutty (so I do my best to ignore both - IT'S NOT PERSONAL; it's across the board), I am happy to have gone through my feed today.
The thing about this holiday (and most holidays - but Christmas in particular) is that it brings everyone's pain or struggles to the surface in a very potent way. When faced with the reality that loved ones are not near or are no longer here, and that the end of another year is fast approaching, the surface crap of our day-to-day falls away and what's real is all that remains.
It can be a really hard time for so many.
My feed is filled with so many pure hearts right now, and it makes me feel very honoured that each of these beings have at one point said yes to having me be part of their cyber world and daily life by sending a friend request or accepting mine. And I was so happy to give love to their expressions and probably "liked" and commented on more things today than I have in years. Sorry if I missed you. I only looked through what was visible at the time I went on my page. I didn't go on anyone's page specifically.
My goal for this year was to delete 90% of my friend's list by next week. I have yet to delete anyone because it feels too daunting. I have temporarily solved my issue of irritation by using my public page 99% of the time over the past few months, and just popping back to tag. I don't check in. I do what I'm here to do and then I return to my quieter cyber corner because it's sane there.
I offer my heart to my clan almost every day and I think that's plenty. I thrive by sharing my energy with the world as opposed to sharing it with individuals. Paige and Melanie are the exceptions of course, and a handful of other sacred hearts in my world.
I imagine that once I do take the time to curate my friends list, I won't feel the need to avoid this space, but until then, you know where I am.
I wish all of you many moments of peace and love and gratitude amongst the chaos this season.
I love you.
Mandy xo
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