With my sweet friend and mom's bestie, Brian.
The pictures I am holding are of Copper (mom's last dog) and of Brian and my mom. When I walked into his room, there they were. Of course I cried. To see him half the size he was in December (the last time I saw him), and to see the picture of he and my mother on his table...a waterfall.
Before today, the last time I spoke to Brian was in March. We had plans to have breakfast at Fifty's (mom's favourite restaurant and where we went for each of our birthdays) so that we could catch up, but he wanted to wait until after his medical appointment in London later that month. They were doing some testing so we agreed to connect in the near future.
Which brings us to today. I received a call from a woman whom I don't know...a friend of Brian's who didn't know our connection but said he spoke so highly of me and thought she should reach out in case I wanted to say goodbye.
She told me that Brian has only a few days left and has pancreatic cancer that has spread to his liver and elsewhere. The thing is, just over a month ago, his test results came back negative. Then...stage 4 cancer.
What a surreal experience, to have the man who was by my mom's side through thick and thin as she dealt with cancer herself, be here facing the same fate, with even less of a warning than my mom had. They gave her two months once the cancer reached her brain, and they were right.
Brian got to Lisaard on Monday, after only one week in the hospital. That's how quick it goes :(
And gratitude. For the stranger who called my home today. For the TGT customer and heart friend who drove me to see Brian (and all of you who offered). For the beautiful space that is Lisaard House. For the wonderful, kind staff and volunteers there.
And for time with Brian So, so, so grateful for that. When I arrived, Brian's sister and her hubby were there. It was our first time meeting. She hugged me the whole time I cried. They were so happy to meet me. They were very kind. We've exchanged numbers and like them now, I too will be visiting daily while I have the chance.
When Krista and I were leaving, another friend of Brian's walked through the door to go visit him, and lo and behold, Krista knew him! Small and sacred world.
Friends, I share all of this for the same reason I share anything. Because I hope and trust that by sharing my personal experiences, my genuine feelings, and my sacred truth with those who care, that someone reading my heart will be reminded of something they may have forgotten about themselves or about life.
Tonight, I wish all of you a lifetime of moments that bring you closer to who you are and to the ones you love.
And if you can, please send love to my dear friend, Brian, as he prepares for his next great adventure.
With all my love,
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Off to bed with puffy eyes and a very broken heart :( Thank you, my sweet friends, for your words and care tonight. It really, really, really matters. You matter. We all matter. And we're all so lucky to be here. Please count your blessings tonight...and every night, because one day those nights will run out.
Give all your love while you can, in all the ways that you can, to all the beings that you can.
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